Friday, July 2, 2010

Time Portals

I was on my way to my New Thought Roots class one Monday night just before I moved a few weeks ago. I was picking up boxes off of Freecycle in the U District and looked at my watch as I was stuffing them in my back seat at 6:13. I started to drive to class and realized I was very hungry. I thought, "Oh well, I'll just be hungry, I need to be at class by 6:30 and I'm already going to be late". Something inside me went "NO". So, I decided I had all the time I needed and was not going to rush and I would get something to eat. I drove over to Wallingford, got two Dick's Deluxe burgers and a milkshake, ate them while driving and was parallel parking in Madison Valley at 6:28. I told the class during my check-in that opening portals was my new super power. They were amazed and asked me how I did all that in that time frame. I just said, "I knew I could, so I did."

More recently, I was sitting in a White Tantric meditation at Summer Solstice and had to hold postures and mudras and chant for 62 minutes. When I treated each iteration of the chant as the only moment in time, time opened up and I was aware of the effortless eternity of "now". I never thought I could sit for 62 minutes without moving, but I did and it was so powerful! Whole days seemed like minutes. The same thing happened that allowed me to drive for 12 and 13 hours a day.

After Solstice, I went to the Neem Karoli Baba Ashram in Taos. My last morning there, I led a mala of Gayatri while playing my harmonium in the Hanuman Temple. I sank into the "now" of it and all of a sudden, I was back on the ghats in Rishikesh on my 2nd River of Sound tour with Ginaji. We were in a state of ecstasy and she tackled me in the river and we both came up to the surface giggling and whooping. It wasn't a memory, I was *there*. I then went to Varanassi and revisited events there, to Tiruvannamalai and also visited myself and family back in Richmond in the mid '80's.

Judge Thomas Troward, a founder of New Thought, says that the totality of eternity is available in every second and in every point in space. I think that's why these portals show up when I'm focused on the present moment. Time does exist there, ALL of time and All of space. That's where everything is possible. Deepak Chopra talks about it a lot, I think he calls it the causal realm, but I'm not sure.

Surface and Depth

I feel like I've been posting a lot of fluff lately in my facebook status updates, which isn't my norm. I've had profound shifts on this trip that have shaken the bedrock of my existence, but I can't post about them yet. It feels weird to post fluff when a gaping chasm larger than the Grand Canyon has opened up in my consciousness and I'm dancing on a sheen of apparent reality at the surface, kind of like the surface of rainbow coloured soap bubbles.

I did manage to post a detailed answer to a question of Kimberly Ross's about time portals that I'm going to post as a stand alone blog post, because it's something I've been wanting to say and couldn't. At least the ability to answer questions is still intact, lol. I suspect I still need to integrate a lot and I have a strong need to be quiet. It's so good that I'm in a safe, loving environment with little to no responsibilities to process all this.

I feel intoxicated all the time, but the degree varies. Sometimes I feel so saturated in Love that I feel like my physical body may dissolve into it at any moment. My vision is blurry and my brain is not functioning in a linear manner. I feel like I need adult supervision when I leave the house. Just ask my daughter *grin* How does one lose their phone while pumping gas? I wasn't even using it! I'm on the Internet on my laptop for the first time in weeks (for a laptop junkie, that's saying a lot!) and it's the first time I've been able to even think about processing and uploading pix. Nothing technical appeals. After Kundalini yesterday, the intoxication sensation increased dramatically. I could barely key in the code for the Washington cherries I was buying at the self checkout. I was wandering around the store in a daze. It's a nice daze, but geez!

I don't know when or even if I'll be posting about the deeper stuff. I have no way of knowing. My inner guidance says to be it instead of talk about it. I've been getting the message about "actions speak louder than words" for a few months now and this takes it to a whole new level. It's all good, either way. I'm doing Kundalini meditation and singing and playing my harmonium every day and taking life as it comes with my daughter. At this point, it's all I have room for and it's enough. At least I got it together enough to post this and that feels good. So, for those of you who have asked me to keep you posted on my inner journey, there you have it. Whether or not there's more to come remains to be seen. Peace, out.






Me and Hari Singh, my newest ~Angel~. I am so grateful to have an entire flock of Divine beings, loving and guiding me along my path.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

On the eve of my departure

There is a part of me that loves adventure (shocking, I know!). There is a stillness that occurs just before a new one starts. The wrapping up of loose ends is complete and there is time for contemplation. Contemplation of the chapter that is coming to a close and a savouring of the gifts that have been bestowed on me and my life.

Tomorrow is the end (for me) of my Roots of Science of Mind class. I present my final project then hit the road. My classmates all have one more week. I'm sad that I'll miss their final project presentations, as they are all amazing spiritual adventurers and this class has been quite intense for us all. Being immersed in such a highly focused, conscious and awake group for 9 weeks has heightened my communication with the etheric realms. I pretty much have a two way, always on communication channel open with Spirit. It's a good thing, because I'm not doing any of this work, I'm just the conduit. It's nice to have everything flow so effortlessly.

I agree with Colette's theory that we really don't know the source of the information we receive from the etheric. What I call God could really be my own Higher Self. I use a variety of names when I talk about it: Guides, Spirit, the Ma, God. I think it doesn't really matter and they are all interchangeable. What I do know is that the information contains Truth, so I heed it. I've learned by trial and error that it's in my best interests to follow it. It's why some people call me a great manifestor. It's not really me, I just follow orders.

So, on this eve of my departure, I'm remembering a conversation I had with the Ma on the banks of the Ganga in Varanassi in October 2008. I was getting ready to embark on another adventure, my first time being alone in India, and I was terrified. I felt so ungrounded and unsafe and was seriously questioning my sanity. The Ma took me in her arms and told me to relax. She said that I was always held in Her arms and She was going to introduce me to some wonderful people. She was right.

A few weeks ago, She came to me in the middle of chanting with my Kirtan Wednesday chanting sangha. She said "Look around the room, this is what I meant. It's not just India I was talking about." I gazed around the circle at my beloved friends and Love welled up in my heart and spilled out of my eyes. I am so grateful for all the beautiful beings in my life! I'm so glad I had faith and listened when She whispered into my heart.

As I prepare to leave on yet another adventure, my ego has learned enough to know that there's no need to freak out, thankfully. I'm comforted once again by the Ma's words, knowing I carry all my beloved friends in my heart as I journey and meet new people who will become beloved friends. Jai Ma!

Sunday, June 6, 2010

My Blog Has A New Name

It's time for a makeover! My spiritual journey has evolved, and so has my blog. I'm gearing up to embark on an immersion into the Sikh practice of Kundalini Yoga and White Tantra as practiced by the followers of Yogi Bhajhan. I'll be spending 9 days in the desert of New Mexico delving deep. I got my first taste of White Tantra the day before Easter and I find it's the juice behind what I've learned so far about Nada Yoga. I am excited to be going deeper into this practice and sharing with you what I'm learning.

The Winter of 2009/2010 was a long dark night of the soul for me. I dismantled a lot of old, unhealthy patterns that were wired into my psyche. I have emerged on the other side stronger and more centered than I ever thought possible. There were times over the Winter that I didn't think I was going to survive the process and I'm glad I had the courage and faith to continue. The blessings have already been profound.

I've decided to recommence my study of Religious Science and am currently enrolled in the last prerequisite for entering the Licensed Practitioner program in the Fall. I am also considering finishing my BA concurrently. All these choices are interwoven and serve to deepen my spiritual practice with the intention of living my life as a demonstration of what's possible and being a resource to humanity. I'm excited about all the amazing wonders that have come as a result of this journey so far, and am excited about sharing recent and upcoming revelations with you here.

Buckle up, here we go!

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

A New Take On Easter

Center for Spiritual Living Eastside and Amazing Grace Spiritual Center's combined Easter morning service blew my heart and mind open. Once again, New Thought lived up to its name, bringing a whole new wealth of information to the fore from the Easter story in the Bible.

Consider the disciples. They've given up their whole lives to follow their teacher. They've left their families and homes, left their jobs and changed their names, embracing radical new ways of thinking (any of this sounding familiar yet?). I can imagine they became dependent on Him. Then, poof, their teacher is gone. Can you imagine their reactions?

Grief. Loss. Disbelief. Is He really gone? Did we really have that experience, or did we just imagine it? What are we going to do now? All the good in my life today is because of Him! How can we go on without Him?!?

When Jesus appeared to the disciples after His resurrection on Easter morning, he told them what to do; don't cling to him, carry his teaching out into the world. Jesus said, "Do not hold on to me, for I have not yet returned to the Father. Go instead to my brothers and tell them, 'I am returning to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God." ~ John 20:17 "Feed my lambs." ... "Take care of my sheep." ... "Feed my sheep." ~ John 21:15-19

In other words, "Don't cling to me, I'm moving on. Go do the work I taught you to do." I find it interesting he called them brothers and said "my Father and your Father" implying a position of equality. To me, the message is clear.

We all have amazing teachers. We want to depend on them, but we are called to go out into the world and live their teaching. We are not serving the Greater Good by staying in their protective shadows forever, we have the opportunity to emerge into the Light and live the brilliance we've learned from them out in the world. "I tell you the truth, anyone who has faith in me will do what I have been doing. He will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father." ~ John 14:12

What a great example this is to follow. What great inspiration. Go forth, in this time of resurrection and new life, out into the world and live what you have been taught. May we all leave our fears behind and show the power and Grace of living in the Light. Sat Naam (The Holy Name is Eternal Truth)